The Sound of One Cat Playing With a Paper Bag

You haven't had a cat story in awhile, so here's a short one. It's 2:30 am, I have to be up at 4:00 am anyway to get a plane, and my cat just woke me up by investigating a very loud paper bag. Almost as delicious as a de Grey article. Is there anyone out there who has a Cat Who Eats Paper?

I wonder if she understands what she eats. Like, if the cat could talk, could she discuss SENS intelligently after all the de Grey articles she's chewed up? Could she give me nutrition advice having eaten the complete works of Michael Rae?

I just don't sleep, and it's starting to show. It's nice to be able to chat with my European Three Hundred brothers in the middle of the night, but I really must find some harmony between my sleep schedule and the time zone in which I reside.